Love is a positive, long-term emotional feelings towards a romantic partner. It’s beautiful the locus is the heart and its focus is long-term; it speaks affection, has direction and moves toward a destination.
Lust on the other hand is basically selfish desires, an impulsive passion for an abstract or concrete thing which could be an object or a subject. It’s an ephemeral, superficial attraction towards someone. Lust can imitate love same way affectation can be mismatched with affection.
African men who marry American or European women old enough to be their mothers are the only one who could tell if the motivation is love or lust but ideally it tends toward citizenship acquisition, material possession and the like.
Just as there are wolves in sheep’s clothing there’s lust in love’s attire. In fact, both go together for one partner may be in love while the other is driven by lust. I’ve heard ladies and guys alike complain on several occasions that they love their two partners equally. Is this really possible?
Anyway I went to town to know the difference between love and lust and if it’s possible to love two romantic partners equally.
“Love is aboutpassion and natural affection for a partner; love loves everything, negative and positive in a partner. Lust is a bit complex because it’s based on material things. Interestingly you can lust after a religion or profession. So in theory you might think you love both partners equally but in practice you’ll prefer one.”
“Love is not instantaneous, it’s a process, a work in progress which involves a lot of commitment after knowing and liking the content in the container; lust is basically love at first sight; it’s like a burning candle which fizzles out in no time. You can love two partners at the same time but not to the same depth and over time you’ll prefer one over the other.”
“Love, a natural phenomenon comes from the bosom of the heart while lust on the other hand is infatuation, it comes from the mind. It’s not possible to love two partners equally because both are not exactly the same.”
“Love can be compared to when you don’t have a tangible or an immediate reason to be in a relationship, in other words you love ‘in spite of’ not ‘because of’. In all honesty people who claim to love two partners equally are insincere or perhaps suffering from self-deceit. They love the heart of one and the gifts or body of the other.”
“Lust is temporal while love is permanent. It’s not possible to love both partners equally for instance I’ve a partner that I love but I crush on other people but it ends there for I can’t choose any of them over my boyfriend.”
Michael J Chinedu
“Love has many faces but lust is selfish and empty, it’s driven towards short-term pleasures. It’s possible to love two partners equally if they both have what you treasure most.”
“Love is an affectionate feeling you’ve for someone who automatically becomes part and parcel of your life. You care, call, meet yet miss. Lust on the other hand is similar to love but dies prematurely. It’s not possible to love two partners equally because you can’t be in love in the first instance and fall in love with someone else.”
Omolayo Omoblack Olasan
“Love is when you’ve strong intimate feelings for the opposite sex because of special features of the person but not basically because of sex. Loving both partners equally isn’t real because one would be more amiable, lovable than the other. So people in that situation are running two programmes simultaneously which is love and lust and may end up marrying one based on lust or love.’”
“Love is emotional feelings that grow but lust is basically ‘love at first sight.’ It’s possible to love both partners but not equally. I was once in that situation but decided to stick with the one whose character I cherish most.”
“From my point of view, love takes time to mature and bear fruits; lust however is about me not you which is selfish thinking and the motive is basically sex. If you truly love a woman the way you love your sister that’s love. Only someone residing in the island of confusion would love two partners equally. It’s like not knowing the one to choose between orange or apple better still fried rice or jollof. Those who claim to be in that quandary are suffering from underlying greed.”
Saka Precious Titilope
Love is expression of affection but I’ve got no answer for lust. It’s not possible to love two partners equally because they’re two different personalities so you choose the one whose personality blend perfectly with yours.
Thanks, keep a date with me next week.
Olayemi Ogunojo is a relationship cum life coach, public speaker, mentor and freelance journalist.